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Unnecessary Apologies

There are a few things that get under my skin no matter how hard I try to not let it bother me. I've already discussed my issues with using the word "normal" to describe children or people without dwarfism when speaking about Asher - or making any insinuation that Asher is not normal. But this one bothers me even more - even though I know that the people who do it mean only the best.

"I'm so sorry to hear about Asher's dwarfism" (or some variation thereof)

Apologize that Asher is sick and not feeling well. Apologize that Asher is on a sleep strike and I'm past the point of total exhaustion. Apologize that I still haven't lost the last five pounds of my pregnancy weight (I'm kidding...please don't even consider doing that). But do not, under any circumstances, apologize to me that my son is who he is.

To apologize or have pity that my son is a Little Person is to imply that there is something wrong with him. Public Service Announcement: there is nothing wrong with my child (other than this whole no sleep thing - for the love of God kid, mama needs a solid 5 hours of sleep!). There is nothing wrong with being a Little Person. It is not very common, it is rare, it is unique, but it is not wrong.

And this is not limited to Little People. Why do we often feel the need to apologize and have pity on people that have a difference? I'll be the first to admit - before Asher, I did the same thing time and time again. But one of the many, MANY amazing gifts that my son has bestowed upon me, the greatest has been how much it has changed, and drastically improved, my view of the world around me.

My definition of beauty has expanded. My view of perfection has changed. My interpretation of what is "normal" has broadened to be more inclusive than I could have every anticipated. And that is a gift that most people in this world unfortunately won't ever get the joy of experiencing.

So please - before you look at people who have a difference, whether it be a hearing or vision impairment, a physical disability, a genetic difference, and pity them - take a minute to acknowledge that they are equally as human as you are. They are equally as normal as you are. They are equally as perfect as you are. And that there is NOTHING to apologize for.

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